Chapter 8  : Xiaye, Don’t Be Sad

As the car slowly drove past him, Han Yifeng could vaguely see Xi Xiaye, who sat in the car with her head turned the other way, looking out.

He hesitated for a moment. He hesitated whether he should chase after, yet after a momentary contemplation, the mixed emotions in his eyes quieted down. At last, everything returned to its previous calm state.

Suddenly, by his ear came the soft sound of Xi Xinyi choking on her sobs.

“Yifeng, I... did I do something wrong? Sister, she...”

Han Yifeng turned around and saw gloom written all over the delicate face of Xi Xinyi. Her beautiful eyes were teary, yet she still bit down hard on her lip, determined to force her tears to stay in. When he saw this face, it inevitably made his heart ache for her sake.

He did know what to say. He could only tighten his grip around her waist and pull her further into his arms.

Xi Xinyi then hugged him and leaned tightly in his embrace, her stifled cries muffled.

He looked ahead pensively at the car that had already vanished into the hazy drizzle. Then, Han Yifeng coldly retrieved his gaze, focusing on Xi Xinyi who buried herself in his embrace to cry. His apathetic face started to ease and he said softly, “Okay, don’t cry now. We’ll slowly explain these things to her later on. She’s a very sensible person, so she’ll see it and will understand.”

“But, but... when I saw her like that earlier, I was really devastated. Father says she hasn’t been home for a long time already. She’s definitely still blaming Father and Mother because of us...”

“Let’s not talk about these things first. Get into the car. Uncle and Aunty are waiting for us at Emperor.”

Han Yifeng took out a handkerchief from his pocket and carefully wiped away her tears. He opened the car door and coaxed, “Get into the car first.”

Xi Xinyi sniffed and swallowed the lump in her throat before she tearfully got into the car.

...

The car sped towards the north city’s Emperor Entertainment City. Along the way, Xi Xiaye did not say anything. The car was filled with an indescribable gloom. It was so stifling that Su Nan felt an acrid and bitter taste in her throat.

She wanted to console her, yet she saw Xi Xiaye had already leaned back and maintained her composure of looking out the car window. Her cold lips were sealed tightly. Through the dim lights outside the car with various depths that kept reflecting her in their brightness, in that instant, if one looked over, she seemed particularly desolate and distracted.

“Xiaye, don’t be sad... I’m sorry, I... I know I shouldn’t have acted like that, but I really couldn’t control myself. Seeing them in their cheap happiness, I just couldn’t hold back. I was about to explode and go crazy! How could they still live so happily without feeling ashamed at all after hurting you?”

Su Nan was furiously rambling on as both her hands held Xiaye’s shoulders. She looked at Xiaye’s fair and beautiful face before she asked anxiously and with worry, “Tell me, Xiaye. Have you not let go? It’s been so many years, but you haven’t been willing to let go and try to accept another relationship. Is it because you haven’t let go of Han Yifeng? Is it? Tell me!”

Su Nan shook Xi Xiaye by the shoulders and asked dejectedly.

Xi Xiaye became dizzy from her shaking, so she could only lift a hand to hold down her hands that held her shoulders. Her crimson though slightly pale lips parted with a voice filled with fatigue and powerlessness. “Su Nan, stop talking. Just let me be alone for a while, okay?”

“Is it that hard to answer this question? Xi Xiaye!”

Su Nan fixed her stare on her.

Xi Xiaye was stunned. She fell silent for a moment, then she suddenly put down her hand that was on Su Nan’s arms. Turning over to Su Nan, she thought about it for quite a while before she finally said softly, “He and I have long become the past...”

Have long become the past...

She already knew all of this from a long time ago. Her circumstances had already been marked with a full stop.

...

At Emperor Entertainment City, City Z’s highest-class and the one and only consumption area.

This was where many money-squandering establishments of rich people were at. Most of them were people of status.

The Su family was also considered a literary family. Su Nan’s father was the President of University A, while her mother was the city center’s educational administration director. They did hold some status in City Z, so Su Nan could be considered the daughter of an eminent family too.

Usually, Su Nan would frequent Emperor, not only because the dishes there were delicious, but even more so because of their one-stop service. She was also satisfied with the attendants’ flawless customer service.

Every time Su Nan asked Xi Xiaye out for a meal, 8 out of 10 times would be at Emperor, so as time went on, Xiaye was used to it too. She immediately decided on Emperor for the homecoming dinner for Su Nan.

After the food and drinks were served, Xiaye poured herself a drink and downed quite a few glasses at a go. She looked quite pale. From the side, the watching Su Nan felt heartache and sadness seeing this.

“Drink a few with me. Tonight, I’m welcoming you home. Aren’t you going to drink a little?”

Xi Xiaye frowned as she finished the drink in her glass. She turned to Su Nan who looked worried and said softly, “Don’t look at me with that look that says ‘I told you I’m fine’.”

Then, she reached out and was about to pour herself another drink, yet Su Nan beat her to it. She took the bottle and filled up her glass. Only then did she pour Xiaye half a glass. In a husky voice, she said, “You want to drink, so I’ll drink with you, but you have a poor stomach. Drink less. Half a glass for you, one glass for me.”

Su Nan held up her glass and downed a few drinks.

There was a faint smile across Xi Xiaye’s face. She suddenly looked down at the half-glass of drink in front of her. “Thank you, Su Nan.”

With Su Nan, Xi Xiaye would forever be grateful. Perhaps after so many years, it was only Su Nan who had accompanied her. When the winds were strong, she would remind her to put on more clothes. When the times got hard, she would be the first to appear then and there. To drink with you and chat with you...

Su Nan reached out to pulled at Xiaye’s cold hand that was on the table, as she said softly, “Silly, do we need to mention these things between us two? Xiaye, don’t be sad now. There are many good men in this world. The Earth continues to orbit with one less trash man like Han Yifeng, for someone like that. It’s really not worth it!”

Xi Xiaye did not answer. She just breathed in, then she suddenly turned to look out the window. What entered her line of sight were the bright lights, the flickering neon lamps that shone so much that her eyes started to hurt.

Before she was caught in a daze, she suddenly remembered Han Yifeng’s apathetic figure when he left back then. No matter how hard she tried, no matter how she had swallowed her pride to beg for him to turn back, she still did not get him back...

‘Let go, Xiaye. You know that I love someone else now, and that person hasn’t been you.’

‘Let go of each other. You’ll forget with time. I hope you will live well. I will do my best to make it up to you.’

...

She remembered that when he had turned around to leave, the weather was like that day.

She remembered that back then, she had wanted to chase after him, but when she saw the woman sitting in that car, she instantly lost all willpower.

In the end, she still did not rush up to ask why, or let Han Yifeng give her a reason. Instead, she stood for a whole night under the pale yellow streetlight and endured the rain for the whole night. Until she saw dawn break did she feel stiff and numb all over. She laughed in a daze at herself for all the damage that was done.

Because of his indifference when turning back, all of her hopes had turned into a passing cloud. What was left was a heartwrenching pain. It was a pain that was felt in the bones, a pain that was numbing.

She suddenly felt incredibly repressed and upset, the exhausted and numb heart of hers suppressed that piercing sore that had faint traces of being resuscitated. She finally could not hold it in anymore. She got up and said to Su Nan, “I’m going out for a breather.”

Su Nan was startled. She wanted to get up and chase her when the phone in her bag suddenly rang...