Editor: bodyinthefreezer

The Macul dragged me into the Door of Darkness.

What were they trying to do with me? I was too overwhelmed by fear to breathe properly.

At that time, the Macul who were descending at a tremendous speed, slowed down little by little and laid me down gently on the floor as they got off my body.

“Thank you.”

I thanked them. Even though they suddenly kidnapped me, they didn’t hurt me in any way.

Then the Macul, which was shaped like a bean sprout, gently swayed its body side to side, as if saying ‘You’re welcome.’

They didn’t seem to have any intentions of hurting me.

[Argh!!]

I heard the scream of the Goddess yet again.

The Macul shook its body nervously and began to fly to the left.

I stood there and looked at them and they wagged their tails as if telling me to follow them.

“Do you know where the Goddess of Light is?”

The Macul shook their heads.

They brought me here for the Goddess of Light.

I also wanted to save her so I followed the Macul immediately.

This place was very dark, so I followed the light coming from the Macul’s body.

The floor was also muddy so it was hard to walk. The muds kept getting inside my shoes. One of my shoes had disappeared without me noticing. I ended up taking off the other shoe and lifted my long skirt up.

[Argh! Argh! Laontel! Save me! It’s too hot!]

The Goddess sobbed as she screamed. Whenever she cried, the earth shook. All her feelings of grief, anger, despair turned into poison, and the poison came to my body.

My legs felt heavy and my hands were numb.

The more I walked, the stronger the stench got. It became more difficult to breathe because of the murky air.

Just how far was she?

I was thirsty, out of breath and my legs were heavy.

My body ached more with every step that I took. I had to hurry up and save the Goddess.

***

How long did I walk for? One hour? One day? Two days?

I continued walking as I relied on the light of the Macul. I couldn’t feel the flow of time anymore.

My sense of direction had also disappeared.

Was I going the right way?

I wasn’t going in circles in the same place, was I?

I couldn’t see anything other than the light from the Macul.

And I couldn’t hear anything except for the occasional screams of the Goddess and the sound of my footsteps.

As time went by, I grew more afraid and forgot about the pain in my body.

I was afraid I’d be buried in the dark or die without lifting the curse.

When my body and mind reached its limit, a blue lake appeared in front of my eyes.

It was a beautiful place full of various flowers. I ran towards the lake without thinking of anything.

And the moment I put a hand into the water, I heard a woman’s voice.

***

“Goddess, is that you?”

“Laontel, you have finally arrived.”

There was a woman standing by the lake and I knew who she was,

It was the Goddess of Light.

“Are you here to see me?”

“Yes…”

The Goddess of Light smiled shyly, but I wasn’t Laontel. So why?

I saw what the Goddess of Light and Phillip looked like before, but I never knew what Laontel looked like.

Laontel was the ancestor of the Bellacian family and the owner of the power of light.

Among them, Ancia should be the one who was most familiar with Laontel, but why couldn’t she see her face?

At that moment, a face appeared on the lake’s surface.

Was I finally going to see Laontel’s face?

A girl with blond hair and peridot eyes came to view.

She looked a bit like me, but a little older…

As soon as I looked closer, I realized instinctively.

That woman was me. I was Laontel Bellacian.

I thought that I was able to see what happened a thousand years ago because of the Goddess’ power, but it wasn’t because of that.

They were the memories of my previous life. That’s why I couldn’t see Laontel’s face. It was also why I could hear Laontel's voice.

I was the mage of light.

The Goddess of Light and I often met by the lake.

“Laontel, how long are you going to call me Goddess? We're friends.”

“But you're a Goddess…”

“My name is Serphania.”

“Serphania…”

“You're the only one who knows. It's a secret, okay?”

“Okay.”

“Call my name.”

“Okay, Serphania.”

She smiled brightly.

“You finally became my friend.”

“Not really. I have always been your friend even before. Huh?”

Then suddenly, I heard someone from behind.

“Who is it?”

I shouted carefully.

I was preparing to attack the person, when suddenly, a boy came out of the bushes.

He had silver hair and crimson eyes, paired with thin lips and a slightly angular jaw.

When Laontel saw the boy, she relaxed and burst into laughter.

But I froze.

That boy was Richard.

No, it wasn’t just the face, even their soul was the same.

“Phillip!”

Laontel called him Phillip

“Why are you here?”

Phillip…

Phillip was Richard.

I didn't like Richard ever since I met him. It wasn’t because he was a scheming man who used to do evil things in the original novel.

It was because I instinctively realized that he was Phillip.

As soon as I realized that I was Laontel, memories from a thousand years ago resurfaced in my mind.

“I came to find you because you suddenly disappeared. The count is worried about you. Let's go back quickly.”

I grew up with Phillip. His mother was the Emperor's mistress.

Zelcan's Emperor touched many women. Only the ones who had Roum blood could become the Empress, but the majority were not so they stayed as a concubine.

The Emperor did not recognize the children from those concubines.

The Emperor abandoned Phillip's mother as soon as he got her pregnant. She stayed in Count Bellacian's mansion because he felt sympathy for her.

But, his mother died early because she was too depressed after being abandoned by the Emperor. Phillip and I grew to treat each other like siblings.

“I told you I’d be late today.”

“Who do you say that to?”

“Eldest brother.”

I had two brothers. They also cared for Phillip as if he was their younger brother.

“Let's go back for now.”

“No, I'm going to play with my friend now.”

“Friend?”

Phillip turned his head and saw Serphania.

“Oh, hello.”

She spoke shyly.

“It's an honor to meet you. My name is Phillip.”

Phillip reached out to take her hand.

She gave him her hand carefully.

As soon as he held her hand, Serphania's face turned red.

There was a smile on Phillips's usually expressionless face.

I thought they fell in love with each other at first sight.

Turns out, Phillip already knew all about her and approached her on purpose.

***

I was stuck in the memory of the past and could feel my hand was muddy.

I thought I touched the lake, but there was mud all over my hands. This was not the lake.

It was all an illusion.

I saw the lake where Ser and I first met, and we always played together there.

Was that an illusion I created?

If so, did Ser show it to me so I could recover my memory?

I didn't know what the truth was, but I couldn't just sit still like this.

I continued to walk.

Suddenly, the lake appeared again.

But unlike before, it looked like the lake during autumn.

As soon as I went there, another memory resurfaced.

***

“Ser's hair is really beautiful, I'm jealous.”

I brushed Serphania's hair.

Two people sat next to the fallen leaves near the lake.

Serphania remained the same but I had grown up.

“Laon is very pretty too.”

We had become close friends and given each other nicknames.

“Is that so?”

“Yes, I'm sure Rakshul would think so too.”

“Why are you talking about Rakshul all of sudden?!”

I yelled in embarrassment.

“You're getting married soon.”

“Oh no… something like that is…”

“I heard about it.”

“Who said that?”

“Phillip.”

Serphania and Phillip had become lovers.

Ser hid her appearance from everyone except for us, so I was the only one who knew about their relationship.

“It's not like that…I'm the only one who is in love.”

I liked Rakshul. I even applied to become the Imperial mage because I wanted to see him often.

But he only saw me as a friend.

“Really?”

“Yes, it's just my unrequited love.”

“Having an unrequited love must be hard.”

Serphania sighed.

“Are you making fun of me now? What do you even know about unrequited love?”

“I know.”

She laughed bitterly.

Come to think of it, even at that time Ser had known about Phillip’s true feelings.