Deep love (complete)(4)

Fu jianchen came to France to bring me back. Before he left, he helped me deal with everything, including that indescribably terrible marriage.

After returning to the country, he arranged for me to stay in a villa. There was a nanny to take care of me and a driver to make it convenient for me to travel.

I don’t like to go out, and I don’t want to go out either. I stay at home every day in a daze, and the longest thing I do is stare at the sky.

In the past, every time Fu jianchen looked at the sky, I didn’t understand why he would look at the sky. What was there to see in the sky?

Now, I seem to gradually understand his feelings and understand what’s so good about the sky.

!!

Fu jianchen would come to visit me occasionally. He would bring the latest paint, drawing paper, and a lot of information about drawing.

But I don’t have the desire to draw, and I don’t want to pick up the brush again.

Fu jianchen didn’t force me. Sometimes, he didn’t say anything when he came. He sat beside me and we looked at the sky together.

To aunty, we looked like two lunatics, but I knew we were different.

The person I’m looking at is right beside me, while the person he wants to see is beside another man.

He was very pitiful.

I’m also very pitiful.

We are all very pitiful.

（9）

On New Year’s Eve, Fu jianchen came over to have dinner with me, and he left after dinner.

Over the years, Fu jianchen had two habits. One was that he never let go of the prayer beads on his wrist, and the other was that he would go to the mountain to burn incense every spring Festival.

Even if he was in the faraway France, he would leave me behind and come back just to burn that joss stick.

I didn’t understand it before, but now I do. He must have made some wish with the Buddha, and the Buddha agreed to it. That’s why he has to go once a year, regardless of the weather.

This was because he was afraid that once he slacked off, the Buddha’s promise would no longer be valid.

I also want to pay my respects to Buddha and make a wish with him. When Fu jianchen returns, I’ll tell him to bring me along next year.

He waited from dawn to dusk, but all he got was an unfamiliar phone call.

There were too many people going up the mountain to burn incense, so there was a stampede. Fu jianchen was trampled to death while trying to save a little girl.

At that moment, the world spun and his soul cracked.

By the time I arrived, the crowd had already been evacuated, and the injured had been sent to the hospital. Fu jianchen was lying quietly on the mud, his body covered in footprints and his face stained with mud. He was still tightly holding onto the old string of glowing Buddha beads.

I knelt beside him and gently brushed away the mud on his face. I couldn’t help but laugh.

The police and the onlookers looked at me strangely.

“Look at you, so what if your Buddha beads don’t leave your body? So what if he came every year to burn incense? The Buddha doesn’t even bless you, he doesn’t even come to you!”

How could I have known that this man had prayed for the Buddha beads to protect him for so many years, but it was not for himself?

Perhaps I was too emotional, a sweet blood rushed up my throat and I couldn’t help but spit it out. My vision turned black and I fell unconscious.

When he woke up again, he was in the hospital. There was a lovely lady sitting by the bed.

I’ve seen her many times on TV, on the internet, in my dreams, and in Fu jianchen’s phone screensaver.

This was the first time I saw her, and she wasn’t as pretty as the one in Fu jianchen’s screensaver.

However, none of that was important.

“These are the prayer beads that jianchen always wore. I think it’s better to leave them with you.”

She placed the prayer beads on my bed and said before she left, ” I’ll leave the gallery to you as well. You can do whatever you want with it.

I was discharged and went to the gallery that I hadn’t been to for a long time.

The decorations hadn’t changed for many years, but most of the paintings on the wall were still Xu Youyou’s.

However, when I reached the resting area, I saw a painting that should not have appeared here.

The shop assistant told me that the boss had brought this back from France. It was a painting of teacher Chen before he became famous, and very few people knew about it.

I looked at the painting on the wall and my tears fell like rain.

It turned out that the painting he took away was nothing else, but the first complete painting I drew when I was 16-” candied gourd ”

It’s the candied gourd he gave me back then.

（11）

I wanted to draw again, in the first year after Fu jianchen’s death.

I set up an easel in front of his tombstone, picked up the brush again, and painted from the dusky sky to the sunset.

After finishing the last stroke, I heaved a long sigh of relief, as if I had finished my life.

It was short, but she had no regrets.

I got up and sat down in front of the tombstone. I picked up the bottle next to me, poured out countless pills, and swallowed them.

She lay quietly beside him, revealing a long-lost smile.

“Fu jianchen, I won’t ask you to love me this time. However, when we’re crossing the river of forgetfulness, can you slow down a little? wait for me, Yingluo. Don’t leave me alone.

I’m afraid Yingluo won’t be able to eat the candied gourd you gave me again.”

The night breeze caressed the easel, and the paper rustled as it rubbed against the easel.

The setting sun shone on the painting, and the still-wet paint painted the side profile of a man wearing a string of old prayer beads on his wrist.

[tail]

I gave that string of beads to mo Jiayue, the daughter of his most beloved.

The name of the painting was ‘deep love without crossing’, and it was signed: Zhang Hui.

Chen wanlai was the pen name Fu jianchen gave me, and Zhang Hui was my original name.

The spring tide brought the late rain, and the boat crossed the wilderness.

All we’ve done is to be deeply in love.

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